Dementia is a long and difficult journey, but it doesn’t have to be a lonely one. The Respite Care program has been a tremendous support for us during this challenging time.
My husband, Jim, was diagnosed with early-onset dementia at 62. Our family was devastated. Jim had always been outgoing and athletic, having recently retired from a successful career with an international oil company. At the time of his diagnosis, he was leading programs for MBA students at William & Mary. We knew he would have to retire from this second career, but we couldn't imagine him becoming homebound. Staying active seemed crucial, and as I was still working, quitting my job wasn’t an option. But soon, Jim reached the point where he couldn’t be left alone.
We started by hiring caregivers to come to our home while I worked, but it didn’t seem to meet his needs. Jim was such a people person that the one-on-one interaction at home wasn’t enough, and the cost of home care was incredibly high.
That’s when a friend suggested we look into the Respite Care program. I was hesitant at first, worried that Jim might be too highly functional for a group setting. But we gave it a try, and from day one, he loved it! The staff is exceptional at tailoring their approach to each individual, and Jim always felt like he was simply part of a social group. In fact, when his former colleagues asked what he was up to, he’d proudly say, “I’ve joined a social club for seniors.”
The activities at Respite are fantastic. Jim especially enjoyed painting and often came home with something he’d made. He discovered talents we never knew he had, and the best part was how much he enjoyed being engaged. Music was another highlight—he was particularly fond of a harpist who played regularly, and he’d always tell me he thought she was an angel! Lunchtime and snack breaks were filled with lively conversations with the staff, volunteers, and other members. He would come home full of stories to share.
The difference between sitting at home with a caregiver and attending the Respite program was night and day. Not only was Jim thriving, but I was also able to continue working, knowing he was well cared for and genuinely enjoying his time. The program was so affordable that he could attend every day it was open.
Although Jim recently passed away, I remain a dedicated advocate for the Respite program. Friends who are just beginning their own journey with a loved one often ask me for advice. Without hesitation, my top recommendation is to explore the Respite Care program.
~ Deborah Hewitt, WUMC Member